Our Pain Defies Time

Its the 16th of the month and a cloud of gloom binds each one of us again; reminding us of the heart wrenching incident that occured just 90 days back.

Our sorrows no doubt aren’t limited to the dates on the calendar. There are just sudden frequent moments when we find ourselves bowed with grief, anguish, pain and longing of our beloved Maula RA. Silent tears are shed in our loneliness and sometimes while we together discuss the magnificent Burhani Daur.

Many times I think this pain, this sorrow is a permanent one and it shall only end with our lives, till the day we see our Maula RA, till the day we get the prestigious sharaf of deedar and  qadambosi of the sahib who taught us walayat and then based every pillar of Islam staunchly on it, carving in our hearts the  essence of Islam and the true eternal love of the Haq na Dai.

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Alaikas Salato Alaikas Salam!

Amate Syedna TUS,
Xeynab

Changing to Appreciate

“Wow! What a perfect egg you made mummy!” my son complimented as I presented him his breakfast plate this morning. All of a sudden the early morning drowsiness had evoporated as I examined the egg and then felt proud of it. I was happy and that compliment was an instant morning energizer.

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My father in law occasionally remarks, “I have misers in my house. They seldom appreciate” which is so true. We as a society have become pessimistic in our approach.  We have become so accustomed to looking at the half empty glass of water that we never notice and care to first appreciate it’s half full! We jump and first complain about the empty part.

So to speak of myself my son is so lavish with praises that he has actually motivated me to iron my clothes well, choose the right colors and do the same for him. It’s his jubilant remarks like, “Oh wow those are beautiful papra mummy! [he used to call kapra (clothes in Urdu) papra a few months back :) ] and it made me so happy. His happiness with my choice and remark while his eyes glittered swept me away and made my day. That is when I learnt to appreciate.

I have witnessed that appreciation is a unique power. Children who wouldn’t ever bother to put effort and listen became not only listeners but generated results in application. They felt cared and loved. They just needed the right attention and motivation. Simple. This is what simple loving words of appreciation did. Today they became the monitors and responsibility takers. Same goes for the toddler, teenager, young adult, adult till the very last stage of age. Appreciation breaks the ice.

Aqa Burhanuddin Maula RA in an entire talk of Shk Hebatullah stopped him and appreciated him whenever he talked of positive aspects in his conversation, which was an exemplary and an act of extraordinary patience while listening to the toughest details Sheikh Sahib gave.

Recently Janab Shk Ammar, The Masool MSB Trust shared that when he presented his note book in Jamea Saifiyah to Aqa Maula RA there were mistakes in the very first three pages but the first thing Maula RA did was He RA appreciated his hand writing.

I recently attended a workshop on leadership by Mr. Abbas Hussain and Mr. Zahir Siddiqui in which they prominently emphasised on the fact how culturally we are miser and poor of appreciation. One of the best leaders are the ones who know how, when and where to appreciate.

Its been long that we bring appreciation as a key instrument of motivation in our strategies and plans as it is the first undoing procedure always successful.

Objectives like change management which is the global focus in every arena of life today could be tackled better with the wise and honest use of appreciation.
So lets unlearn the pessimism and learn to appreciate and celebrate for a better happy and motivated US!

Cheers,
Xeynab

The Tree

I am a tree. My leaves are lush green and flowers pink. My fruit is ripe and its very sweet. I am loved by everyone around me but I do have a tale to tell…

When I was young and had just sprout out, I was very ambitious.  I was in a hurry to get the maximum nutrition to grow and develop so that I may become a strong fruit bearing tree one day. Hence I worked hard. I would be ready to take in the most of the nutrients and would actively involve myself in generating food for myself. I was clearly better than the rest.

Pride became my inevitable companion.  I would consider myself better than rest of my friends who weren’t as strong as me and would just concentrate on becoming stronger and better. I was selfish. In doing so I became arrogant and as a result lost many friends. I was young and impulsive but one day I did realise that life isn’t about becoming all tall and strong alone. It is about helping others to do so also. It was then when I made true friends. I would help them to become strong and share my food and water. It made me very happy and satisfied to see them grow and flourish with me.

Now today we are a whole family of big trees. We have grown up together tall and strong. I have beautiful fresh leaves and wonderful fruit. The fruit that I bear has caused my trunk and branches to bend but I have to bear fruit for the benefit of mankind. I have to offer my best and then get the most love from the world around me.

PL25103 - 80mm Fruit Tree - With Fruit

 

I love to give. The more fruit I bear, the heavier it gets for me to stand straight. I am now totally bent but I dont mind it at all as I am there where I wanted to be since many years. I am a tree; a satisfied one with all my ambition served.

(Xeynab)

No Traditional Essays Please!

“Man is a social animal.” Numerous essay books of many authors use this punch line to start their essays. It is one of the most conventional lines used in textbooks and those resource ones.

However the current trends and mediums of communication has rendered us helpless to customize ourselves according to the needs of the time.

Today to get your audience you have to present a captivating line and really prove you have a solid, valid point. Not only the print media but electronic as well. People are simply not interested in what you want to say, people would like to see what you have to offer to them! In the form of information or entertainment,  your point should be apt and put across crystal clear.

Today readers really want solid concrete stuff. Hence even a simplistic mode of language used is not really an issue if you have a matter of genuine interest for the audience to offer.

Much debate is going on the social mediums about the ethics of blogging. Today the world of business looks for customization,  connectivity and retention seeking tactics which bonds the customer to their client. To achieve that the world of business marketing wants true honest feelings communicated to the customers.  They want their writers to share their customer’s concerns and answer to their target interests by forming a personal bond with them. Today they do not require traditional essays. They want direct,  short focused strategies and material which makes the audience visit their page time and again for the highly empathic material they have on the site.

Many students of O, A Levels and higher learners of the English Language really have to struggle in the current times to cater to this new realm of business ethics. Many brilliant writers are simply told, “Honey,  I want fashion blogging! not essays on the vitality of the spring colors!”

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There is an increasing sect of writers today who are trying to become as chirpy and vivid as possible.  Some are nailing it while some do struggle with the genuineness of the material to be presented.

The point behind all this debate is that times are changing and so are the requirements of us but it is this time that flexibility of one’s ability pays off. It is time we show our elasticity to this trend and give the world of business exactly what they want!

Back & Forth,
Xeynab

Back to Makkah; Back to Masjid ul Haram!

I couldn’t believe the worth of my eyes, the strength of my fate and the assurance of what laid ahead of me. It seemed a myth, an experience too much for my senses to realize, a dream too much to be actualized, for I was to experience, not an experience of ‘a’ lifetime but an experience which certainty carries the worth of a struggle of lifetimes.

I was to enter the gates of the Masjid ul Haram. I was to enter the majestical presence, the realms which promises utmost proximity to Allah. My feet wobbled as I made my way, with anxiety at its peak- to witness; to see the Kaaba for the very first time in my life.

Back in 2010 I prayed Hajj. Never a moment of that journey could be compared to any collection of moments or even the best of my entire life. Being close to Allah is an irreplaceable,  incomparable larger than life experience.

Every single tawaaf is unforgettable. In the heat- or in the glorious nights of Makkah, the divinity of every single moment is etched in my soul.

Prayers, peace and accomplishment; happiness, love and confidence; strength, will power and immense gratitude are only a few words of my limited diction certainly unjustifying the enormity of the limitless emotions felt there. I would sometimes just sit and encapsulate in me the visual that lay just in front of me- The Holy Kaaba; The House of Allah.

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Hussain and myself

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The Kankar gang

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Someone had to click it too ;)

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The group

Today as I walk down the memories of my pilgrimage, my heart aches to reach that best land- the best of the many worlds. I wish to orbit around the Kaaba one more time;  just like the planets do around the sun; just like the angels do in the heavens above; above and beyond…

For my Lord knows; and knows ALL,
Xeynab

Sharing via Social Media

The amazing thing about WhatsApp, Facebook and other social media is the exchange of illustrations and pictures with matchable quotes. I have been receiving and saving many some wonderful ones and read it from time to time. It is wonderful how we relate to them and share amongst eachother. Of the little joys, these pictures and illustrations offer a definite source of energy, motivation or sometimes sheer lifting of spirits.

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The above are just some I have been saving since yesterday. I loved each message and hence want to preserve them here on Xeemarmar.

Inspired,
Xeynab

Maula TUS and that Pearl shaped Island

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Sri Lanka is a little tear shaped island dangling right below the Indian subcontinent like a hanging pearl. I have had the blessed fortune of having traveled there twice–both consecutive Asharas with Hayyul Muqaddas Maula RA. My sister had just gotten married there and her in-laws were remarkable hosts to more than 25 guests.

Both Asharas were memorable, more so now in hindsight, because since then I have been unable to attend Ashara with Maula RA. Even though this was some 7 years ago (My Alefiya was one year old then), memories of this island’s capital city Colombo, its balmy breeze, its aquamarine skies, its enthralling shopping malls; Kandy’s winding roads, Nuwara Elai’s hill station-ish climate is firmly embedded in my mind.

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Sri Lanka’s worth has amplified to no bounds ever since Aqa Maula Syedna Mufaddal Saifuddin TUS has repeatedly blessed this country with His TUS presence. And each time, believers the world over have gasped in wonder at the tremendous fortune of the momineen who live here and have taken barakat time and again.

It is clear that Maula feels rested there. And anyone would need rest–the itinerary Mufaddal Maula TUS follows is impossible to pertain to by a human. It is only in Maula’s TUS celestial capacity, that bound by the shackles of time, Huzoorala TUS spends every moment in blessing momineen and emancipating them; bringing them closer and closer to the showers of barakat of Burhanuddin Maula RA.

I wonder what that land holds–the same soil where Adam Nabi AS had first stepped on. What magnetic treasures lie in that earth that Waliullah TUS has blessed it with His TUS Aqdaam Tahera four time since Nass? For nothing is just chance; there is no randomness in this existence. Everything has a deeper meaning-a loftier purpose, especially if it is the action of Haq na Dai TUS. This musing delights me.

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Today too, the first time since Maula TUS has become Dai, after a week long stay at Bandarawila, Momineen of Colombo will get the bounty of Huzoorala’s TUS waaz mubarak. I get news from my sister, about Maula’s TUS schedule and it makes my heart fill with joy that someone so close to me-nay, a part of me-is there reaping barakat. Someone is there who is praying for me and performing deedar on my account. It is as if I am an there too spiritually. I can imagine it all. The honey coloured walls of the Husaini masjid in Colombo, the glass doors of Qutbi Hall, the alley which leads to the masjid gates, the view of the crashing waves from the masjid windows and the whistle of the train who’s track is just at the shore.

I have the most incredible memories of this beach and train track. On the occasion of the end of the second Ashara in Colombo, Burhanuddin Maula RA was travelling to a hill station by train. My sister in law had just got married the night before and after a late night of wedding revelry, we were sleeping the sleep of the dead the next morning in our seaside apartment. The shrill ring of my phone woke me. It was my sister. “Are you at the tracks? Maula RA is leaving in the train.” That snapped me out of my slumber. I yelled at everyone to wake up. Throwing on our ridas, the men fumbling with their kurtas, a two-year old Alefiya in her kitten nightie clasped in my arms, we ran to the tracks in five minutes flat.

We heaved a sigh of relief when we saw momineen still gathered at the tracks. Suddenly Maula RA stepped into the train amidst cries of ‘Maula Maula’. As the train chugged to a start, I ran after it. I ran with Alefiya in my arms. I ran until my chest ran out of breath. I ran as the train pulled away until it was just the train with Maula RA in it and me and my daughter and Burhanuddin Maula RA gazed at us. I knew Maula RA was looking at me. I can still feel that gaze. It makes my eyes prick with tears and I can feel the goosebumps even today.

“Maula TUS looked at me!” I gasped to everyone in exhilaration, panting for breath to fill my lungs.That was my final deedar of Maula RA in Colombo. Had I known it, I wouldn’t have stopped running after that train.

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Today, on the first of Jamadil Sani I wish fervently that I be in Colombo whenever Mufaddal Maula TUS sojourns there.

Amate Syedna TUS

Maryam

The ‘Homework’ Syndrome!

Homeworks could be such a turn off! Even for a 5 year old! That I realized today…

After his friend’s birthday party I told my son to finish off the Math task. Reality struck him like a lightening bolt and his whole excitement seemed to be replaced with haggardness and boredom. He did some and after that he gave up saying he was tired. I didn’t push him either as I don’t believe in overburdening a 5 year old with things he would rather not do. Yet it was rather amusing to see how he struggled with 1-100 digits and with every milestone gave off wary signals.

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I guess the pictures speak louder than words… :)

However on a serious note, these kids of 2014 deserve to be given a homework which matches their calibre and level of interest,  more like captures their interest. Effective use of technology may do the trick. Tapping and innovating on new ways to make learning effective could do wonders to the young minds of today. Also creative motivational techniques can prove healthy in getting their noses hooked to the books from time to time…

Till then as they say ‘we gotta do what we gotta do!’

Xeynab

Alaikas Salato Alaikas Salam

Once Aqa Burhanuddin RA visited Niagra Falls, there just besides the Falls were trees. Those trees were so close yet they remained mostly dry and aloof from the great Falls. At that moment Maula RA commented that although the trees are so near to the source yet they remain dry and unaffected.  Similarly one may physically be very close to the source of Haqiqi water I.e. Waliullah but may remain unaffected.On the contrary those far away may be physically away but remain lush and green with the love and blessings of them.

A fact it is, in the world Maula RA was demographically far away and today worlds apart; but the barakaats in both times, the love and blessings in both eras never ceased to be felt. Today, again a Friday takes us back to that Friday when we bode adieu one last time to our Haqiqi Parent RA, that day when our hearts and lives suffered an irreparable dent whose marks shall remain  and resonate in our souls till eternity.

A physical distance there is undoubtedly, but the truth of the matter is that only the utterance of His RA name “Burhanuddin” proves a source of therapy, help, joy and peace.  The name is present in every aspect of our lives. Like the name of Ali AS the dai of Ali AS displays the same shaan, and provides the same help and guidance with just an utterance,  an utterance of His RA name with love, longing and remembrance.

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Today maybe just another Friday to the world, but to us momineen every Friday takes us back into the alleys of remembrance; remembrance of that Friday when our lives were taxed heavily with the fateful price we paid. Yet we remain calm and sure of the eternal blessings, of His RA dua, His RA nazar in His RA Mansoos TUS which eradicates the notion of distance altogether.

In Him TUS we see You RA and inshAllah will see Him TUS in You RA till the very last day, till eternity. Ameen

Amate Syedna TUS,
Xeynab

Causing Distaste through Bad Marketing

I had to rephrase the entire content because I intend not to hurt,  pinpoint or blame. Nevertheless first hand experience and observation has what has made me compelled to write that the the application of marketing concepts are outdated and actually corrupt in the country.

Yes, corrupt because they are conflicting with the values of the country and acting negatively with not only the sentiments of the majority of people but also the true quality of the intellectual set up of the business done.

I will hereby speak only of my current observation…

The billboards throughput the main Shahra-e-Faisal Karachi; (connecting Clifton) marketing local brands specifically of apparel are doing injustice to the culture, tradition and values of the state. Sheer display of heaving bossoms, provocative styles and an incomplete dress (lacking a dupatta) poorly depicts a poor fashion sense with respect to regarding the rich heritage of culture and norms of the society.

I in no way intend to make a debate on religious grounds. I just want to comment on the marketing ethics. If there is any arena of business most effected with the age of communication, I believe that has to be marketing.  Today one has to be extra cautious on the demands, quality and honesty with which the product is delivered. Today’s consumer is not only much smarter but is well informed with the word ‘google’ on its tips.  If someone offers a flawed product,  then a few flashy marketing gimmicks might had proved fruitful for a while in the past but today due to an epidemic of social sites, the word of mouth, conclusions derived, experiences shared and comments made it has become increasingly possible with these devices a make or a break of a company.

So, my dear marketeers of the country if we are selling our products disregarding the ethics, promoting shamelessness and a confused imagery in the name of business, it will eventually face its deserved fate.

The other common site is that its a shame that we need celebrities from across the border to endorse our local national brands. Having said that let’s pay attention to where are we trying to position ourselves. What are we trying to portray our national image as? Are we trying to say we lack the celebrities of the caliber that could endorse our own national product or are the image we wanting to create doesn’t support our belief and value system? Why then? We should first justify the ethical need first.

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Apart from that the city of Karachi seems that the only thing it is meant for is lawns, soaps and celullar phones. Is this the limit of our intellect? Using a sexually suggestive photograph of a woman to sell even a soap with a tag line of irresistibility and then blaming with a huge hue and cry of indiscrimination against women! Is this all women are meant to be? I am not saying anything my loved ones, I am merely asking!

It’s a shame to see amidst the local brands, international ones showing much concern and consideration towards their land of host. So, to sum up I am giving out no religious fatwa. I am not saying there should be no billboards of women but what my point is the gestures, incomplete apparells and unnecessary display of male-female proxomity should be avoided to stop the confusion, hatred and discrimination around. Considering marketing ethics and remaining at par and receptive to the modern trends of communication and then applying marketing concepts would do wonders to your product’s image and would initiate a revolutionary trend of quality growth in the field.

Xeynab